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Wednesday, June 2, 2010
A Look Back...
Although this class has seemed to be a real thorn in my side at times, I will walk away feeling like I know how to analyze a subject, and articulate my thoughts better than I could when I started ten weeks ago. I have returned to school to pursue an engineering degree and took this class to satisfy both my English and diversity requirements. I have always done well in any subject that pertained to math or science, but the idea of this English class created a bit of anxiety for me. I have not had to do any legitimate writing in almost fifteen years but my wife assured me that I could do it. Easy to say, for an English major who has taught five years of high school English. With her support and my nose-to-the-grindstone attitude, this experience hasn’t been so bad. The workload has been manageable, and the reading has been insightful. The day I opened my email, and discovered that I received a B- on my first paper, I was a little dejected. Two office visits, and what I thought was a much better paper later, words cannot describe how deflated I was when my second paper came back two points lower. It was the proverbial punch in the gut. The days that I received my grades for my first two essay assignments were by far the most painful moments I’ve had in my return to academics. However, the conversations that I’ve had with Lolly and Andrea after the fact have taught me some of the finer details about writing and maybe to relax a bit also.
I am 33 years old, and have a beautiful family at home who both supports, and inspires me to continue full steam ahead. Being a father and a husband is a role that I covet, and I cherish every moment spent with my wife and kids. My son is nine, and my daughter just turned six months old. It is my goal to show them that when you put your mind to something, and pour every ounce of energy you have into it, you will be rewarded. Maybe you get knocked off course a time or two, but in the end, hard-work pays off. I grew up with a father who preached to me about all of the things that I needed to do in life. I however, would rather show my children the way to success, than beat them over the head with the same ideas day after day. Given the fact that I have a great job, that more than provides for my family, many have wondered what I’m doing chasing a degree. That idea reveals much about my personality and journey through life—never really stopping to smell the roses. I am a person who never seems to be completely content with what I have achieved in life, and am always trying to add a new wrinkle here or there. Becoming an Engineer is the next chapter for me, on my journey through life, and I will leave no stone unturned in an attempt to make this dream become a reality.
The themes covered this quarter have been identity, community, and tradition. I began the quarter just relating identity to who a person is, but over the course of the quarter found a deeper meaning. I came to the realization that identity is something that is formed over the course of one’s life, and is influenced by many factors including culture, religion, and gender. The movie Bend it Like Beckham, helped define what it means to be an insider or an outsider and strengthened my understanding of identity. Community had a pretty simple definition when I started this class. I have come to realize that all of the groups that we are a part of become a community in some fashion. Communities can be detrimental when they are focused about a misguided notion but for the most part I found that they are an intricate web of support for their members. The viewing of The Visitor focused on boundaries and helped to create a correlation between identity and communities. The quarter culminated with the exploration of traditions. I once thought of traditions as the basic holidays, but now look at things like family meals and weddings as traditions. The major idea that will stick with me about traditions is that they provide a basic framework that will continue on into the future, but will be changed over time to suit the needs of those practicing it. This quarter has provided me with a much deeper understanding of the three major themes covered. The interactions on the discussion boards, major essays, text reading, and films have all been instrumental tools in developing my insight on these topics, and will leave a lasting impression.
With this quarter culminating we are compiling our best pieces of work that illustrate strengths in four different areas—critical thinking, revision, audience awareness, and a culmination piece of our choosing. I have chosen the second timed writing assignment to show a bit of critical thinking, the first timed write as a revision project, a discussion post from the tradition unit to highlight audience awareness, and our final paper concerning traditions to reflect my strongest work of the quarter. These are all pieces that stood out to me and made the choices easy.
Lou Holtz once said, “You were not born a winner, and you were not born a loser. You are what you make yourself be.” I feel as if I have worked extremely hard this quarter to come to some kind of conclusion about the intricacies of our society, and become a much stronger writer. I feel that I have gained skills that will pay dividends as my academic career advances and as a member of society.
The Wheels are Spinning
I have always thought of myself as someone who could analyze information and draw a well thought-out conclusion from it. What I discovered throughout this course is that I needed to work on articulating that information in a much more defined manner, and get directly to the point. I chose the second timed write as a piece that demonstrates my critical thinking skills because I was able to draw some conclusions from the movie and articulate them to the reader. The film The Visitor was the focus of the assignment and was an independent film that required some critical thinking to sort it all out. The prompt was to consider your own perceptions of non-conformity, and how did the film and the group discussion that ensued challenge these perceptions. The tricky part was that the discussion board leading up to the timed write didn’t have much activity and became a two person dialogue rather than a group effort. The movie dealt with some issues that can have some gray area and I did my best to draw a concrete conclusion as well as address the prompt. The statement “given the choice of abiding by the law or living a life in this country, I, like Tarek would be forced to cross the line and my own morals to live a life of freedom in this country” illustrates an effort to think about the issues, address the prompt, and draw a concrete conclusion. Articulating the specifics of what I am thinking is a skill that I will continue to work on, and this class has been instrumental in further developing that skill.
What is Really Right?
Non-conformity is the act of not bowing to the legal and societal pressures that are present in every aspect of our lives. As citizens, we are required to live by the laws of the land, and any noncompliance has some sort of ramifications. Society has its own set of standards developed by the communities that we are a part of, and not complying with the status-quo is considered an act of defiance—crossing the line between what is acceptable and what is not. The film "The Visitor" examines the personal impact of crossing the line both legally, and personally, and the positive and negative impact that that experience can have on individuals, and challenges the viewer to think about what is really right, or wrong.
Citizenship in this country is something that is a legal right, and not having it puts the violator in conflict with the laws of this country. The law is very clear. There is no gray area or anything left open for interpretation. You are either a citizen, or you are not and crossing the line of living in this country carries strict ramifications that call for the deportation of the violator. In the movie "The Visitor" we are introduced to a character Tarek, who is in this country illegally, but is a vibrant young man who has much to offer this country. He is a young man who comes from a country that is known as a breeding ground for terrorists, but, is only here to live a life that allows him to explore his passion for music, and experience the American dream. He has crossed the line of legality by living in this county illegally, and regardless of how good his character is, the line in the sand is clearly drawn and it has been crossed. As people with a heart, and compassion for our fellow man, we feel for Tarek and think that maybe there needs to be an exception to his legal line crossing, but, the government doesn't see it that way. As a citizen in good standing with the law, I try to obey the laws as best I can. This situation however moves me to believe that breaking the law is okay, in this situation, and he should be allowed to remain in this country to live a happy successful life. Given the choice of abiding by the law or living a life in this country, I, like Tarek would be forced to cross the line and my own morals to live a life of freedom in this country.
Society also has its own set of rules to live by. The communities that we are a part of determine the rules and how to comply. The protagonist in our film, Walter, is an Economics teacher, from a small college in Connecticut, who is unhappy with the life he is living, and in need of something to become passionate about. Society has preconceptions about what type of people should be involved in certain kinds of activities. Walter has an interest in music, but his efforts at playing the piano are feeble at best. Through a chance encounter, he meets Tarek, who plays the African drum, and when Walter shows an interest, Tarek offers to teach him. Walter becomes consumed by drumming and the outlet that it provides him. The point where he fails to conform to society is that a white, middle-aged Economics professor from the suburbs is not a person who, by definition, would be playing his drum amongst a crowd of African Americans in the middle of Central Park. He is the last person that you would expect to see playing his drum and lost in his music. My experiences in life have taught me to accept everyone for whom they are but the sight of Walter in his dress shirt and slacks, playing that drum, scream—I am out of place, and don't belong here.
The movie "The Visitor" is a movie that is chalked full of examples of people not conforming to the status quo, or the legal lines established by this country. As college students and instructors, we all consider ourselves to be rather forward thinking, and accepting of most people. This film however, makes one step back and wonder, how progressively am I thinking. We all think that there should be some kind of law governing who is allowed to live here, but, where do you draw the line, and if the line has been drawn, at what point do you find it morally acceptable to cross it. We all would agree that one should be able to play whatever kind of music they like, and not be questioned, but when presented with the situation we think twice about it. After viewing this movie several times I am still revisiting what I find to be right and wrong. It has challenged my thinking on several levels and will continue to do so. We all have a defined idea of what is right and wrong, but films like "The Visitor" push that line, and make us wonder about what is truly right or wrong.
Mulligan Please!
Out With the Old, In With the New
Jess's skills, he and his wife believe that Jess should seek out marriage to fullfill her cultural commitments. Jess however doesn't buy into this theory. Her passion for the game of soccer far outweighs the dreams that her parents have for her and she is willing to chance their dislike of her choices in an effort to "Bend it Like Beckham." She endures the constant nagging of her mother and continues to play the game she holds so dear to her. Upon catching her playing soccer one day in the park we witness a scene in which her mother asks Jess, "What family will want a girl that can kick a futbol but can't cook?". This line of questioning holds true with Jess's families feelings towards her soccer career and life commitments throughout the movie. Jess is an outcast from her family and culture in the sense that she doens't meet their expectations as a young Indian girl but through it all she seeks her ultimate happiness through soccer.
A supporting character in this film, Jules, is outcast for another reason. Her mother believes that a young lady should look a certain way and dress a certain way. Jules however doesn't buy into this line of reasoning and follows her passion for soccer as well inspite of her mother's lack of support. Her mother even comes to believe that perhaps her daughter's sexuality is to be questioned because she is very tomboyish and seems uninterested in the opposite sex. When Jess and Jules have a misunderstanding over the affection of their coach, Jules's mother overhears the discussion and jumps to the conclusion that her daughter is a lesbian. Her always pushes upon Jules the idea of looking like a lady but Jules will have none of it. She like Jess is following her dreams and refuses to let the thoughts of her mother stop her. She endures daily questioning as her mother just doesn't understand her motives. She is constantly left to feel like she doesn't live up to her mother's expectations becuase she has a dream and won't let her cultural ideas of what a proper woman should look like stand in her way. Inspite of the obstacles placed before her she refuses to let being an outcast in most social circles stand in the way of her dreams.
In life we are all searching for an identity and the makers of this film did a marvelous job exploring layer after layer of societal outcasts. We all have obstacles to overcome in living up to the expectations placed upon us by society and our family. Our family and culture expect us to live up to a certain set of ideals and when we don't there is often a great deal of backlash that comes with it. In the end we are all searching for happiness and sometimes that causes us to become an outcast within our family's our cultural's traditional roles. If we remaing true to our ideals and remaine passionate about what is the source of our utimate happiness, those who are nearest and dearest to us will also come around at some point. We may be an outcast for a while but when our true passions are realized the love and support of our family in friend will follow in the end. Jules and Jess were outcast by their family and friend because they didn't follow the traditional roles their families had intended for them. In the end the most important thing to the ones who are nearest and dearest to us is our happiness and as in this film being an outcast isn't forever.
The new-
Much can be debated about what the true meaning of an outsider really is, but all of that discussion leads back to one idea. An outsider is one who doesn't fit into a given group in our society. We are all an insider or outsider in some fashion, but being on the outside looking in can cause one to question themselves, and the choices they are making in life. To belong often holds special meaning, and to not fit the mold that others want a person to, leaves them being tagged as an outcast. The film "Bend it Like Beckham", was layered with different levels of outsiders, and created a firm understanding of what it means to not fit in from start to finish. The idea that not conforming to the societal rules of your group makes a person not fit in, and thus become an outsider was prevalent throughout the entire film. Characters were developed that challenged the rules associated with many different roles in today’s society, and helped to bolster that definition. It also strengthened my views about the difficulties associated with not fitting your “chosen” role.
Much can be debated about what the true meaning of an outsider really is, but all of that discussion leads back to one idea. An outsider is one who doesn't fit into a given group in our society. We are all an insider or outsider in some fashion, but being on the outside looking in can cause one to question themselves, and the choices they are making in life. To belong often holds special meaning, and to not fit the mold that others want a person to, leaves them being tagged as an outcast. The film "Bend it Like Beckham", was layered with different levels of outsiders, and created a firm understanding of what it means to not fit in from start to finish. The idea that not conforming to the societal rules of your group makes a person not fit in, and thus become an outsider was prevalent throughout the entire film. Characters were developed that challenged the rules associated with many different roles in today’s society, and helped to bolster that definition. It also strengthened my views about the difficulties associated with not fitting your “chosen” role.
The film does a masterful job of defining an outsider, and the main character Jess is the epitome of what that means. As a young Indian woman, coming of age, it is the expectation of her family and culture that she set upon the course of marriage, to a fine young Indian boy, and be the prototypical wife. She is expected to learn how to cook proper Indian cuisine, decorate a proper house, and carry herself as a proper Indian woman. Jess however has an undying passion for the game of soccer that is all consuming. Her parents allowed her to be passionate about soccer as a young girl, but now that she is coming of age, culture, family, and religion, suggests that she should put her energy into the life that awaits the traditional Indian girl. In an act of defiance, which creates her place as an outsider, Jess follows her heart rather than her family’s wishes. Had she given into the pressures placed upon her by her parents, she would have went off to college and left behind any notion of playing soccer. This would have appeased her parents and their culture, and placed her within the boundaries of that group, but she followed her heart, and stayed on the outside looking in.
A supporting character in this film, Jules, is outcast for another reason, and reaffirms the definition. Her mother believes that a young lady should look a certain way and dress a certain way. Jules however doesn't buy into this line of reasoning and follows her passion for soccer as well, in spite of her mother's lack of support. Her mother even comes to believe that perhaps her daughter's sexuality is to be questioned because she is very tomboyish and seems uninterested in the opposite sex. When Jess and Jules have a misunderstanding over the affection of their coach, Jules's mother overhears the discussion and jumps to the conclusion that her daughter is a lesbian. She, like Jess is following her dreams and refuses to let the thoughts of her mother stop her, creating a role as an outsider. Our society has rules about how women should present themselves, and when those rules aren’t followed, people jump to conclusions. These conclusions lead to people being labeled as outcasts. It is very disturbing to see the alienation caused by a parent but it cements the idea and how it comes about.
Speaking to a Public Audience
In choosing a piece that addresses voice and audience I had to look no further than my discussion board postings. Each unit had a discussion board that gave us topics to write a discussion board posting about, that were intended to help foster discussion, in regards to that particular topic. It was my goal throughout the quarter, to create postings that were well thought out, gave the reader something to think about, and add some depth to the content of the discussion boards. I often tried to pick an idea that wasn’t the “low hanging fruit,” and expand upon it. After a while, reading about the same idea over and over gets a little tedious and boring. The piece that I selected which highlighted my awareness of audience and voice was the final discussion board posting from the tradition unit about pop-culture. After writing these for an entire quarter, I have gotten better at working the idea of making the reader think, into a piece, that will have a public audience. The prompt for the posting was to select a given assumption about pop-culture and affirm or challenge that assumption. The assumption that I supported was that pop culture reflects the most current issues and trends in society. I made an effort to elicit some thought on the part of whoever decided to read my posting and got responses that reflected that. I think the statement “sadly, there are amazingly talented musicians and entertainers, whose talents are overshadowed by the freight train that seems to be pop culture” provided some imagery and food for thought for the reader to digest, and come to some kind of conclusion. After all, what’s the point of speaking to an audience if you don’t give them something to think about?
Pop-culture--Flavor of the Month
Pop culture is comprised of everything that is fashionable in our society. Everything that you can conjure up that is part of what the masses consider en vogue can be attributed to pop culture. The entertainment industry has much to do with what Americans consider trendy. The music, movies, and television that is consumed by our society is what churns out the majority of what would be considered pop culture. It does not take into account the quality or talents of the performer or the depth of the cinematic experience. It is based solely on whether it is accepted by mainstream America. In order for anything to become popular it must be marketable to the masses and accepted by those same people. If you polled people today and asked them who or what comprised our pop culture you would get answers like American Idol, Barack Obama, Taylor Swift, Dancing with the Stars, etc. All of the popular and trendy musicians, television shows, actors and actresses, and even some transcendent politicians comprise today’s pop culture. During the sixties if you ran that same poll you would get names like JFK, The Beatles, Elvis Presley, and so forth. The common theme is that these are fixtures of what is popular at the moment and the flavor of the month so to speak.
Sadly, there are amazingly talented musicians and entertainers, whose talents are overshadowed by the freight train that seems to be pop culture. In the essay “Pearls before Breakfast” by Gene Weingarten, the author explores how the throngs of people commuting to work in Washington DC seemingly ignore a world-renowned classical musician. Joshua Bell is known throughout the world of classical music and plays to sold-out halls of music aficionados. The former prodigy is considered a musical genius by many and people pay a hefty price to experience one of his concerts. On a typical morning in the subway of our nations capital, the violinist dressed in casual clothes plays a hand-picked score of music putting every once of his energy into each note and is basically dismissed by the thousand or so people that walk by him. Bell commented, “It was a strange feeling, that people where actually, ah … ignoring me.” The beautiful music that echoes from his one of a kind violin is not trendy by any sense of the imagination and does not fit into what the masses find attractive. Classical music is something that is appreciated by a select group of people and therefore shunned from what is considered pop culture. In almost an hour of playing, Mr. Bell was tipped a staggering $32.17. I can guarantee you that if one of the popular entertainers of our era held an impromptu concert in the middle of a bustling city, people would stop and the situation would turn into a security nightmare. Pop culture fails to embrace classical masterpieces, shunning it for another regurgitated version of what was popular on the Billboard Top 100 last week.
Hmmm... Which One to Choose...
The ten weeks that comprised this quarter, were a gauntlet of sorts, which developed a tremendous amount of insight into the themes of the quarter, as well as coming to an understanding of what it takes to write a strong, thesis-driven essay. For the writer’s choice portion of my e-portfolio, I have chosen the final essay that I wrote about the traditional wedding ceremony, because I think it is my strongest paper, and reflective of the growth that I had over the course of the quarter. The prompt for the essay was to select a specific cultural tradition that has been challenged, altered, or undermined, analyze those changes, and derive some conclusions about the impacts on society as a whole. The kicker was that we had to include an antithesis in our paper yet derive some kind of concrete conclusion. After two papers that did a great deal of dancing around the subject and being very vague, I was able to really focus this one about my thesis. It took a bit of work to get there and some prodding from my classmates and instructors, but I finally got there. It was a paper that was a bit of a revelation as I had originally started with a very broad topic in marriage, narrowed it down to weddings, and narrowed even farther to focus on the changes that have occurred since the fifties. My favorite parts of this essay are the references to the fifties like, “the days of Ward and June Cleaver” and “Eisenhower era”, which was a an effort to rid my paper of broad time frames, and keep it focused on a specific era, without constantly referring to “the fifties”. These changes reflect a shift in my writing, which helped to strengthen my grade and produce an essay that I am proud to be the author of.
The Winds of Change are Blowing
At the heart of every marriage is a ceremony that marks its inception and celebrates the bond between a man and woman. Each culture has its own traditions used to embark upon marriage, but in essence the basics are the same—the finite details are the variable. The ceremony has traditionally been held in the church of the couple’s choosing and presided over by an individual with the legal authority to marry people—typically a minister from the couple’s church or a Justice of the Peace. The ceremony also includes the exchanging of vows as well as rings to signify the couple’s love for each other. The traditional Judeo-Christian weddings of mid-twentieth century America have been increasingly replaced by elaborate celebrations that are more fashion than function. Over the course of the past sixty years the traditional wedding has evolved, reflecting the shift in values and demographics found in our society.
Thanks to the influence of pop-culture, weddings have become a flourishing industry. In the 1950’s, weddings were usually a simple affair that was very traditional and followed the framework that had been established— a church, a minister, a white dress, and the company of one’s closest family and friends to witness the moment. The simplicity of the past has changed, and today Americans spend $40 billion annually(Wedding Industry Statistics) on their ceremonies and the planning leading up to the big day. The idea of a fairy-tale wedding has been glamorized by the media and wedding industry, encouraging more women to want that elusive Cinderella moment. Horse-drawn carriages, luxurious dresses, exotic locales, lavish decorations, and extravagant diamond rings have become common-place in wedding festivities. Much of the explosion in size and stature of weddings can be attributed to society’s need to keep up with the Joneses. The media fuels the idea that bigger is better with television shows such as Platinum Weddings, Bridezilla, Four Weddings, and Say Yes to the Dress, where the focus becomes more about the end result and the experience of the moment rather than the true purpose of the celebration—the joining of the two lives. The wedding industry has created jobs such as wedding planners, custom cake designers, and custom floral designers that are supported by the need to create the elaborate ceremonies and exquisite touches. Not only is there a number of reality shows that are based on the work of wedding planners, Bride’s Television is an entire network devoted to wedding planning and the events leading up to that big day. A recent survey found that half of all brides now plan on using a wedding coordinator in preparing for their wedding(Wedding Industry Statistics). The decadent touches of weddings have become more expensive than ever before, shifting away from the simpler ceremonies of the Eisenhower era.
The last sixty years have seen a sizable shift in demographics in this country which is reflected in wedding ceremonies. In the fifties, when a woman was walking down the aisle, the man she was walking towards would be a direct reflection of who she was. If she were African-American, then typically so was he, and if she were Caucasian, then the odds were that he was as well. People did not typically marry outside of their cultural, ethnic, social or religious borders. However, the boundaries have blurred, and these homogeneous marriage ceremonies do not occur as frequently. In David Brooks’ essay, “Our Sprawling, Supersize Utopia,” the author examines the makeup of suburban America and notes the diversity that has come to fruition. Brooks observes that “One out of nine people in America was born in a foreign country”(186). The influx of citizens from different cultures has diminished the role of the Judeo-Christian wedding ceremony, customary of the fifties. When cultures meet to form a union, traits from each become evident in the couple’s life and are reflected at the time of marriage as well. The traditional tuxedo suit may be replaced by a piece of clothing called a Barong Tagalog if the groom is Filipino, the ceremony could become an array of bright colors if the wedding reflects the Indian culture, or the bride could be covered in heavy white makeup to symbolize her purity if she is following a Japanese tradition. When a bride is waltzing down the aisle, it is no longer an expected societal norm that her husband-to-be is carved from the same mold as she. The makeup of our country has altered from a predominately white society to a more diverse population. Weddings are reflective of the change in society, forging unions between men and women of all races, religions, and social classes, breaking down boundaries of the past but adding to the colorfulness of each celebration.
Although the traditional ceremony has changed drastically over the years, there are still many elements that have endured. At the heart of every wedding there is an exchanging of vows, rings, and two people making a commitment to spend the rest of their lives as one. The basic framework of marriage is still in place today—the vows. Whether the couple is eloping, having a ceremony at city hall or an elaborate gala event, the pledging of one individual to the other till death do us part remains an integral part of the ceremony. They may be customized to reflect the couple’s individuality but that traditional element remains. The ring has evolved from just a simple gold band to, in many cases, an elaborate array of platinum and diamonds, but still the symbol remains the same—that of eternity. Finally, while the two standing before each other committing themselves to love and cherish each other for a lifetime look different than they did during the days of Ward and June Cleaver, they are still the centerpiece of the wedding. Weddings have evolved, mirroring the changes in society, but what lies at the heart of the moment remains unchanged.
Over the course of time, the traditional wedding has evolved, reflecting the characteristics and demographics of modern society, yet all the while preserving its fundamental integrity. Weddings have lost traditional qualities but have gained a richness that was missing before. Our society has been liberated and allowed to break form from the traditional Judeo-Christian ceremony of the 1950’s, allowing each couple to express their individuality. An industry has sprouted, creating jobs, and locations such as Las Vegas and Hawaii can attribute part of their tourism industry to these unique wedding ceremonies. The shifting of demographics has ceased to restrict one’s choice in partner and is evidenced in the diversity of wedding ceremonies. The cost and showiness that has become an increasingly common phenomenon has come with a price, though. Although the shift is not solely responsible for the spike in bankruptcies and fifty percent divorce rate, it has helped chisel away at the rock that marriage once represented. Weddings are a way to celebrate the joining of two people for a lifetime of commitment, and although the tradition has been altered to reflect changes in our society, a wedding will remain the integral event in uniting two people, until death do they part, now and into the future.
Works Cited
Brooks, David. “Our Sprawling, Supersize Utopia.” Remix. 2nd Ed. Catherine G. Latterell. Boston/New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2010. 184-192.
“Wedding Industry Statistics.” Sell More Weddings. 2010. 23 May 2010
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